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June 3rd, 2013 | #1721 |
Banned
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: The Wrong Parallel Universe
Posts: 3,499
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It'z funny to me
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June 6th, 2013 | #1722 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Northwest Montana
Posts: 687
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CAUTION: May cause blindness
Ah' be's a unique and beautiful snowflake....................
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Sine Timore Last edited by Brooklyn Rick; April 2nd, 2015 at 10:35 PM. |
June 7th, 2013 | #1723 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 2,216
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June 9th, 2013 | #1724 |
professional critter
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: under your bed
Posts: 1,618
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__________________
"Don't underestimate the power of 'evil.' ... The fact is, 'evil' makes women horny and men curious. Use those to further the cause." |
June 10th, 2013 | #1725 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: In the land of Hockey Hosers(Canada)
Posts: 2,592
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So damn true.
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June 10th, 2013 | #1726 |
Banned
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: VA
Posts: 487
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June 13th, 2013 | #1727 |
professional critter
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: under your bed
Posts: 1,618
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__________________
"Don't underestimate the power of 'evil.' ... The fact is, 'evil' makes women horny and men curious. Use those to further the cause." |
June 14th, 2013 | #1729 |
Senior Member
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 8,105
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The Heaviest Element Just Discovered!
Scientists at CERN in Geneva have announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science.
The new element is Governmentium (Gv). It has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lefton-like particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons or protons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction normally taking less than a second to take from four days to four years to complete. Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years. It does not decay but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass. When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons. All of the money is consumed in the exchange, and no other by-products are produced. |
June 15th, 2013 | #1730 |
Banned
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 4,481
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June 15th, 2013 | #1731 |
Celebrating My Diversity
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: With The Creepy-Ass Crackahs
Posts: 8,156
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June 15th, 2013 | #1732 |
Celebrating My Diversity
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: With The Creepy-Ass Crackahs
Posts: 8,156
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June 15th, 2013 | #1733 |
...
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 9,741
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I wondered where TXC went
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June 16th, 2013 | #1734 |
Banned
Join Date: May 2013
Location: a LAND that never been occupied
Posts: 1,933
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Update: End of the world cancelled by Putin with 15 hours left
Warning: There will be no end of the world on 12-21-2012 at 11:11 GMT. Please stay calm and proceed with your lives as usual. After intense negotiations and a secret call to the Supreme Being the President of the Russian Feeration Vladimir Putin has made arrangements to move the date by 4.5 million years. Although the President did not say exactly when the end will occur we are asking you to please make no plans for the year 4,502,012 A.D. We will inform you of the exact date when it is made available.
Read more: http://english.ruvr.ru/2012_12_20/Up...15-hours-left/ |
June 17th, 2013 | #1736 | |
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Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 9,741
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Quote:
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June 20th, 2013 | #1737 |
Banned
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: VA
Posts: 487
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There's a penny at the bottom of the oven, but it's too hot to pick up.
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June 23rd, 2013 | #1738 |
Celebrating My Diversity
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: With The Creepy-Ass Crackahs
Posts: 8,156
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June 23rd, 2013 | #1739 |
Banned
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 5,414
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Retirement dinner
Retirement Dinner
A priest was being honored at his retirement dinner after 25 years in the parish. A leading local politician and member of the congregation was chosen to make the presentation and give a little speech at the dinner. However, he was delayed, so the priest decided to say his own few words while they waited: 'I got my first impression of the parish from the first confession I heard here. I thought I had been assigned to a terrible place. The very first person who entered my confessional told me he had stolen a television set and, when questioned by the police, was able to lie his way out of it. He had stolen money from his parents, embezzled from his employer, had an affair with his boss's wife, taken illegal drugs, and gave VD to his sister. I was appalled. But as the days went on I learned that my people were not all like that and I had, indeed, come to a fine parish full of good and loving people.' Just as the priest finished his talk, the politician arrived full of apologies at being late. He immediately began to make the presentation and gave his talk: 'I'll never forget the first day our parish priest arrived,' said the politician. 'In fact, I had the honor of being the first person to go to him for confession.' Moral: Never, Never, Never Be Late |
June 23rd, 2013 | #1740 |
Banned
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 6,145
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